oh yeah, the other half

I need to clarify one point regarding my last post. When I refer to solo parenting, it means just that. I'm talking about the times when David is at work or at school and I am with both kids on my own. I need to add here that when David is home, the world (as in our house with two kids and a dog) is a very different place. I read somewhere that when a couple has their first child, the man becomes a father in the traditional sense of the word, sometimes not as hands on and involved in baby's early care as the mom is. But when they have their second child, the man becomes a super dad, an involved father (if he wasn't already) on par with the level of parenting that mom has to do. It's really a numbers game - dad has to step it up because now each parent is essentially responsible for at least one child almost all of the time.

David has always been a wonderful father to Miles, but I saw something happen when Lydia was born. It's like he went into parenting overdrive and really became my partner in parenting. It has been amazing to watch (and wonderful to be the other half of that partnership). On weekends, David will take the early wake-up shift with Miles so that I can sleep in with Lydia to make up for sleep lost to night time feedings. He'll juggle his schedule so that I can focus much of my time on Lydia if I feel like that's what I need. There are now times (quite frequently, actually) when Miles prefers to be with David over me, when he asks for his daddy instead of his mama. Because Lydia requires so much from me and Miles and David are spending so much more time together, the bond between them has grown. And I've had to learn to trust in this new relationship between them as well as tell myself that this time of Lydia being so needy of me will pass and eventually I'll be able to spend more equal time with each of the kids.

I mention all of this just to say that I couldn't ask for a better partner than David. We both have been able to watch each other grow as parents and as individuals. Perhaps most significantly just in the past couple of months. So when I talk about the challenges of transitioning to a family of four, it's not just my story, but David's too. And there is no way that any of this would be possible without him.

We'll be celebrating David's 31st birthday this coming weekend. On the agenda is a train ride and a family day. He also got a couple of pretty sweet birthday gifts...an iPhone and a new MacBook Pro laptop. Not too shabby.

mothering two

{Photos are for you grandma - per your request}

The weather has been unbelievable. A stretch of warm and sunny days filled with the color of falling leaves. It makes my time off from work that much sweeter. It also helps in that Miles has been sick a lot over the past week or so, and has been home with me instead of being at school. I've been solo parenting Miles and Lydia and I have to admit that I'm much better at it than I thought I would be. When Lydia has a serious explosion in her diaper that requires an immediate bath, when Miles is desperately needing to eat lunch, and when the dog is going batty because he needs a walk, I'm able to tend to all of their needs. I don't know how, but I'm doing it, yes I am. And the laundry is even getting done. Hot diggety. I was so anxious about parenting two by myself, but it's getting easier with time. Pretty soon I'll be able to change a dirty diaper, walk on my hands, pump milk, and make dinner all at the same time. Sweet. Too bad moms don't get paid for this work. It requires a hefty skill set with a major learning curve.

ever changing

She's awake! I just realized that Lydia's eyes are open in all of these photos. Must be because she's finally starting to wake up and do a little living. She smiles at both David and me, turns her head in the direction of Miles when she hears him talking, coos and yelps (it's a happy yelp). Just like Miles, and probably most other newly born babies, her face appears different almost every time I look at her. Ever changing, I see Miles, me, David, and Yasmin in the shape of her face, her eyes, her coloring, her expressions. It changes constantly. I can't wait to see how she grows. The best thing about having another baby is knowing how much fun is in store! The first time around you just didn't know all the joys headed your way.

on the train

Because every parent likes to talk about their child's toileting habits, here's a tribute to what's happening with Miles in this department. The boy is potty trained! Or, as he puts it, I'm on the potty train, mom! No more diapers during the day at school or at home. For a while he was only peeing on the toilet and preferred to poo in a diaper, but no more! He's using the potty like a champ. He's still wearing a diaper at night, but I bet soon enough he'll be done with that as well. I feel so fortunate in that we didn't have to work with him on this very much. I think seeing the other kids at school use the toilet really made him want to do it as well. He did regress a bit after Lydia was born, which we expected, but he seems totally into it again. It's been a gradual process, but really it's only been a few months since he started using the potty at all. Our little guy is growing up, or as he puts it, I know all my things, mom. I'm getting so big and strong! You can be so proud of me! Yes, Miles, we are so very proud of you.